Friday, February 12, 2010

My One Day Employment


My 1 day employment

So, after landing my new job as a Walmart greeter, a good find for many retirees, I lasted less than a day...

About two hours into my first day on the job a very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walked into the store with her two kids, yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.  
 
I said pleasantly, 'Good morning, and welcome to Walmart.  Nice children you have there. Are they twins?'

The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, 'Hell no, they ain't twins. The oldest one's 9, and the other one's 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins?
Are you blind, or stupid?' 
 
So I replied, 'I'm neither blind nor stupid, Ma'am, I just couldn't believe someone slept with you twice.
 
Have a good day, and thank you for shopping at Walmart.'
 
 
My supervisor said I probably wasn't cut out for this line of work.
 

Idiots Stand Up


Idiots Stand Up

"If there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up," said
the sarcastic teacher. After a long silence, one freshman rose to his
feet.

"Now then mister, why do you consider yourself an idiot?" inquired the
teacher with a sneer.

"Well, actually I don't," said the student, "but I hate to see you
standing up there all by yourself."

Note: A stupid man who answers every question with "I Don't Know" is
truly wise for he is never wrong.


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